Things My Parents Were Right About

One:  Tea is the Answer for Everything

In England whether you are celebrating or commiserating, getting promoted or fired, whether you are at home or at work, a cup of tea is never far away.  When your best friend’s boyfriend leaves her, the expected solace is “Let’s put the kettle on and have a cup of tea.”  When you give birth the nurses hand you a baby and a cup of tea.  There is no bad time for a cup of tea and if you find yourself in a situation where you do not know what to do, offer to make a cup of tea.

Two:  Let the Boys Come to You (this one from my Mum when I was a teenager but it is true at any age)

At the time in our teenage lives that you needed to have a boyfriend to belong and I did not, my Mum reassured me and distracted me until I measured myself less by the company I kept and more by the company I could be.  She was always there with a real compliment, a firm belief that I was attractive to the opposite gender, and of course a cup of tea.     

  

Three:  The Tide Turns Under the Ocean

Whenever I was down in the dumps and not sure what to do next, my Dad would reassure me that the tide changes under the ocean where it is not visible to the human eye.  It was his way of saying that our luck has changed long before we know it.  It always seemed that soon after he reminded me of this, things started to change for the better; that ounce of hope was all that I needed.

Four:  Be True to Yourself. 

When I was about twenty I headed to RAF Cranwell for a battery of tests to determine if I would be invited to join the Royal Air Office as an officer.  The examinations went well and I proceeded to the interviews.  I was given scenarios that I had to work through verbally and was asked what I would do in my role as an officer if I discovered that the fellow female officer I was sharing a room with was a lesbian.  At that tender age I genuinely did not understand the question.  It must have been very clear from my face that I did not understand and they rephrased the question to, “What would your duty be as an officer if you found out your fellow officer was breaking the rules by being a lesbian?”  I was confused but dug into my values and answered honestly that I did not believe that someone’s sexuality determined their ability to perform their job.  They sent me home shortly after that and I felt torn by their decision.  I called my Mum and Dad from a payphone and said I had let them down and I was on my way home.  My Mum asked me what happened and after I told her she said, “Nic, we will always support your dreams but you’re just like your Dad – ready to stand up for what you believe in and not made to take orders.  We are proud of you.  Come home…we’ll have the kettle on.”